Saturday, October 27, 2007

Another case of a girl refusing marriage because of dowry

Why does dowry still exist ? There is an increasing trend towards demonizing dowry seekers in the media, in papers, and through demonstrations. One would have expected that by now, dowry seekers would have realized that demanding dowry is a double edged sword. No matter how attractive, handsome, rich, educated, high-earning your son is, if you push the bride's family beyond a certain point, there exists the possibility of the police and media getting called, and then you are really in deep trouble. Because of the deep prevalence of dowry in society, the laws against dowry are pretty harsh, with the intention of seeking to level the balance of power (and many would say, have given the girl's side much higher power through a slant in the law requiring the groom's side to prove their innocence).
And yet people don't learn. Here is an Indian family from the US that apparently demanded dowry, and when the bride's family refused, there was an altercation, leading to the arrest of the groom. Now, it is very much possible that the groom's side was being very demanding, and hence at some point, the police was called and once the magic words of dowry are uttered, things would spin out of control for the boy and his family. It is also possible that there was some misunderstanding, and based on that, dowry laws were invoked giving a major power point for the bride's family.

PATIALA: Taking a bold step, a doctor girl here on Friday refused to marry an NRI who was demanding dowry. Not only this, her family members and relatives taught them a lesson by handing them over to the police.
Gurbachan Singh (father of the bride) told TOI that last night they went to village Kaddon (groom's village), Doraha, with the request that they can't fulfil their demand overnight, but they refused to talk. "Later, we received a message saying that the marriage is still on. We were under an impression that they had given up the demand," he said. SP (city) Mandeep Singh Sidhu said a case has been registered against Gurpreet Singh, his father Bhajan Singh and mother Harjit Kaur under Dowry Act.

The true and complete facts of the case will come out after investigation, but it is very much possible that dowry demands were made. And when the girl is also well-qualified, the demand for dowry seems to almost like a slap in the face to the girl; no matter how good you are, we are the boy's side and you should pay for the privilege of getting such a good boy. It is time that such demands be dropped, and the menace of dowry begone. There, I made a statement like this, but does anyone believe that a social ill such as dowry will vanish anytime soon ?

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posted by Ashish Agarwal @ 2:04 AM